tales from the less crazy side

I didn’t know where to go with this.  I met someone… err sorta. We haven’t actually met yet and he is a stunning slice of beefcake. something about him reminds me of TGTBT. So of course my brain got my fingers typing. TGTBT is engaged to Back burner girl.  I hope she is enjoying all the work I put into him, oh wait, she must be since they are getting married.  TGTBT scoffed at me when I told him about the curse, but it stands true. I have a 90% rate when it comes to ex’s getting married directly after they date me.  At least the ones I feel strongly about….. the horrible ex is a holdout of the curse.

and I started talking to The Body… he’s hot, single, kind of young, attentive, a chubby chaser (which is important when I look like I do) and I like him…… but I wonder… can I just have hot sex with him?  Am I built that way?  Isn’t that how TGTBT and I started? and that ended in train wreck fashion. Do I pass up hot sex in the face of possible heart break?  The Body wants me to come watch him play softball… and he works with kids with special needs but he also says he’s not a relationship guy. Do I start taking people at face value? Do I admit I want a relationship?  Do I send him a picture of my boobs? or do I crawl back into my “hey I haven’t had sex in 8 monthes” cave?

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the end, the glorious end……..

December 20, 2012 Leave a comment

I’m graduating on Friday.  A big fat piece of paper telling people I’m smart.  It’s been so long that I no longer remember why I started this blog.  Maybe it was my foray into the dating world after my broken non engagement.  Perhaps it was a sometimes amusing account of my search for the one…. but either way this leg of my life journey is closing to an end and so is oneisthenumber. How do you close the door on seven years of your life?  It’s easy when the people you met along the way by their own accord fall away.  My mother asked me tonight “so there is no one you would ever come back and see?”  No.  There is not.  There are people I love here, people I hate, but when I go in January it’s all in the rearview never to be seen again.  And there is not one single reason to ever come back.

Onto the new for me after a few strings to tie.  Been swell knowing you all but it’s time for me to move on.  Maybe I’ll start a new blog about how crappy dating back home is…….. or about crafting, or about squishing hipster mom and hipster hubby’s babies……

I thank you all for all of your love and support.  Goodbye!


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December 4, 2012 Leave a comment

I really have nothing exciting going on.  My birthday looms two days away and I already just don’t care.  I did touch up my hair color for the first time in a long while but I tend to forget just how it looks.  While I was in the store today some toothless homeless guy said to me “Hey rainbow head!”

2012-12-04_22-31-32_110then I remembered that my hair looks like this.  It’s my tiny rebellion.

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it’s that time…..

December 1, 2012 Leave a comment

it’s birthday time! My birthday and I have a love hate relationship with each other in that it’s always (almost always) disappointing.  I asked people from work to come out (a bunch of gay guys, who hate other gay guys… yea, this is going to be fun) I’m super screwy because I thought about asking Mr. Chemistry… I’ll mull that shit over.

or I’ll ask Hosehead, or not…..  he and I have agreed to a business deal. Seven pairs of pantyhose, worn by me for an undisclosed amount of money……. this amount is actually pretty big.  I know it’s weird but cash is cash…. he’s not a bad guy but his fetish rules when we talk to each other.  I don’t think he sees me beyond his fetish so being friends or otherwise is pretty much ruled out.

Either way, no matter who I invite it’s going to be a shit show of awesome.  Yay birthdays!!!


Maybe I should let you all vote on who I should invite……. the polls are open.

in the never ever

November 29, 2012 Leave a comment

I finally managed to break it off with Mr. Chemistry.  Maybe I shouldn’t have.  He might have been playing by the rules that he thought I set out but either way we’re done.  And in the flurry of winter lovin’  The Russian got himself a girlfriend and TGTBT and backburner/giant thighs made it facebook official (though he swore it was something he would never do). Even Hosehead got into “a relationship and it’s complicated”……. and I see the guy next to me and the best I can do is belatedly send a message that I like his mustache.

ruby slippers please……

Too many clues

November 15, 2012 Leave a comment

So I’ve still been seeing Mr. Chemistry. At some point we did talk about his ex. But I think he’s seeing someone besides me. There are so many clues, I don’t know if I want to confront him. I’m not sure if it really matters.

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unhinged jaw

November 5, 2012 Leave a comment

I should be shocked, but I’m not. someone who labels himself as an intellectual bad ass ( I’ve seen zero signs of this) said I was fat ,ugly, stupid, selfish and jealous…….  hello, playground of 3rd grade….. bad fucking move.  If I had nothing better to do with the little time that I had left here… now I shall make you fucking miserable.  Dummy.

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